Comments please

[OneWorld]

Just uploaded a track, would appreciate comments please....

https://soundcloud.com/acoustimax/BulletsAndTears

Thanks

[Drew Stephenson]

Typing as I listen and for me the vocals need to come up. It's all about the lyrics and I'm struggling to hear them in places - works better in mono because of the wide spacing but I think they need a lift.
Some nice chord changes in there.
The vocal line at the key change at 3 min doesn't sound very confident and makes the change sound almost accidental.
Arrangement-wise, the opening guitar plays solidly through the first 3 1/2 minutes then drops out for thirty seconds, at which point there's nothing happening in the RH side. Might be worth looking at seeing if there's an earlier spot to drop this to change it up a bit earlier and allow it to balance the LH side during that section.
Really need to bring those vocals up because I think there's a lovely whimsical message in there but I'm having to really dig in to hear it.

[OneWorld]

Typing as I listen and for me the vocals need to come up. It's all about the lyrics and I'm struggling to hear them in places - works better in mono because of the wide spacing but I think they need a lift.
Some nice chord changes in there.
The vocal line at the key change at 3 min doesn't sound very confident and makes the change sound almost accidental.
Arrangement-wise, the opening guitar plays solidly through the first 3 1/2 minutes then drops out for thirty seconds, at which point there's nothing happening in the RH side. Might be worth looking at seeing if there's an earlier spot to drop this to change it up a bit earlier and allow it to balance the LH side during that section.
Really need to bring those vocals up because I think there's a lovely whimsical message in there but I'm having to really dig in to hear it.

Thanks and well spotted. I am just setting up a mew mastering regime, and on checking, in order to get more stereo 'space' I'd panned hard left and right, thinking I'd only applied that panning to strings, but on inspection I had panned everything hard right and left, so yep the voice needs to go bang in the middle.

You're right about the vocals at the key change too, I really struggle with pitching vocals, I am trying to hit notes that I can't and when singing the part think to myself "Oh no, here comes that note again"

[W1D3Y8W0Y]

Sounds lush, I love it, I'd go for more bass personally, but sounds great as is

[OneWorld]

Sounds lush, I love it, I'd go for more bass personally, but sounds great as is

Thanks. I use my hardware synth bass and I can never get a balance, turn it up too much to where all notes are heard and it dominates and sort of muddies up the mix. So I lower the volume to where there is more parity between the instruments, and forfeit some notes being heard, it seems at certain frequencies the bass comes through loud and clear, other notes don't, they get lost.

I am not a bass player, though play the guitar, maybe I should not be a lazy bones, get the bass down off the wall and play a live bass part

[Sam Inglis]

Nice composition with a lovely feel to it. To my ears the vocal level isn't consistent enough. It starts too quiet but there are also places where it sticks out. I think it needs more compression and/or some level automation. The vocal tuning is a bit heavy-handed.

The bass level seems about right to me.

Something bothers me about the use of reverb in this mix. I'm not entirely sure, but it sounds as though there may be a single reverb on everything which is making it all seem a bit homogeneous and characterless. I think I'd want to try out a few different reverbs and delays, and also experiment with making some things more or less dry. To my ears, for example, there's perhaps too much reverb on the guitar.

[OneWorld]

Nice composition with a lovely feel to it. To my ears the vocal level isn't consistent enough. It starts too quiet but there are also places where it sticks out. I think it needs more compression and/or some level automation. The vocal tuning is a bit heavy-handed.

The bass level seems about right to me.

Something bothers me about the use of reverb in this mix. I'm not entirely sure, but it sounds as though there may be a single reverb on everything which is making it all seem a bit homogeneous and characterless. I think I'd want to try out a few different reverbs and delays, and also experiment with making some things more or less dry. To my ears, for example, there's perhaps too much reverb on the guitar.

They are great objective comments, something for me to work on

[Aaron Straley]

I like the song and the general feel of it. Nice composition and lyrics!

For a slight improvement, I have the same thoughts as others. The vocal needs brought out more in some places where it gets low. Volume automation and compression would make sense

[OneWorld]

I had read the comments and done a bit of a re-arrangement and tried to improve the voice, please let me know what you think. Thanks

https://soundcloud.com/acoustimax/bulletsandtears

[Tomás Mulcahy]

The balance is great, I like the melody and the harmonies are cool. I'd prefer a lot less autotune. Sounds like you have an interesting accent, let's hear the character. People love that in a singer. Try going for a performance in one take. There's probably a bit too much lip smacking sound as well- is that a lot of compression?

[Exalted Wombat]

New version is a great improvement. I can now hear most of the words. (But can we go for ALL of them?)

Can't we manage this without auto-tune? Maybe use the tuned vocal as a guide track while recording another attempt? Were you THAT far off the pitches in the opening phrase? It really does sound like a vocoder!

[Arpangel]

New version is a great improvement. I can now hear most of the words. (But can we go for ALL of them?)

Can't we manage this without auto-tune? Maybe use the tuned vocal as a guide track while recording another attempt? Were you THAT far off the pitches in the opening phrase? It really does sound like a vocoder!

Me also, the thing that distracted me was the auto tune, it’s too obvious, and doesn’t in any way suit the nature of the song, makes it sound too synthetic.

[Drew Stephenson]

Balance is really nice now, and you sorted out that vocal wobble at 3 min.
For me the vocal could handle a bit more de-essing, might be worth being quite heavy on this on the backing vocal lines but being much lighter on the lead.

[OneWorld]

Yep I take your point. I try to sing without using Melodyne to fix the pitching but the notes are so far off, well in fact about a tone and a semi-tone, doesn't sound much, but trying to pull a note from say C natural to bE, the artefacts simply cannot be avoided, maybe someone with more skill using Melodyne might achieve better results, I have watched hours of Melodyne 'How To' on YouTube, but even they display discernible artefacts despite 30 mins or more spent fixing a wayward vocal.

I think Melodyne is fantastic software, but think realistically, it can only pull a note back if it has strayed off the path say no more than a semitone.

But I suppose my only other option is to get someone in to sing for me, or limit my hobby to just instrumental work. I guess I am like that woman what they made a film about @Florence Foster Jenkins@ obsessed with singing, but can't

[Exalted Wombat]

Practice singing it half-speed, maybe against a temporary instrumental guide track. You'll be surprised how quickly your pitching improves.

[Sam Spoons]

Singing is a skill that can be learned by almost anyone. If you want to be able to sing better get some lessons with a good vocal coach, put in plenty of practice and I'm sure you'll be able to make a big improvement in your pitching and control.

edit to add :- on another listen (very nice song BTW) you sing very 'gently' I find it harder to pitch accurately when I'm singing like that, singing a little more forcefully encourages one to support the voice more from one's diaphragm and that is the key to control.

[OneWorld]

Yes I suppose I have been delaying the inevitable - that is, get a singing coach, one can teach me to hit the note rather than vocalise something and hope it lands on the note, rather than swooping up to it all the time.

On that subject, does anyone know of a decent simple app where I could for example sing a scale, arpeggio, interval into it and displays the result. I have had a look on Google Playstore but the apps I have come across seem a bit 'over engineered'

I just want to do some drill each day to discipline my voice, in the same way I did when learning scales etc when I learned the guitar/keyboards

Some sort of app that says "Sing Cmajor Arpeggio", "Sing eBminor scale", "Sing a perfect 4th"

[Exalted Wombat]

... does anyone know of a decent simple app where I could for example sing a scale, arpeggio, interval into it and displays the result.

You've got one. I think you said you use Melodyne to correct your pitching? It shows you what note you sang, and whether you hit it 'straight'. Exactly what you need.

[Urthlupe]

Hey fella - great track, lovely writing.

I don’t normally comment here on other folks material - but yours really is peachy

Just a word on the vocal pitch and timing processing. ….

It may help if you relax it completely on the BV’s. Both the pitching and timing of the BV’s to the main vocal are so tight that they blend beyond the point of ‘normality’. The incongruities and modulations that are caused by differing intonations and articulations are missing…. I’m almost suspecting those BV’s are constructed by pasting from the main line in Melodyne……?? If you’re looking for a more ‘realistic’ vocal blend then singing the BV’s and loving some of the timing and pitch differences might help.

You have a talent bud……

Loopy xx